Grrrrr.

I have to ask myself: Do I even want to get better?

What am I doing this for?

To prove a goal? To try to be superwoman?

What's the point?

I'm stuck and I just feel like being miserable. To stop trying.

I was listening to a stupid romantic song and it just felt like the tug of war between my depression and who I want to be.

She = my brain struggling with depression
Me/I = who I want to be

She's all laid up in bed with a broken heart,
While I'm drinking jack all alone in my local bar,
And we don't know how,
How we got into this mad situation,
Only doing things out of frustration

Trying to make it work but man these times are hard,

She needs me now but I can't seem to find the time,
I've got a new job now on the unemployment line,
And we don't know how,
How we got into this mess
Is it god's test?
Someone help us 'cause we're doing our best,

Trying to make it work but man these times are hard

But we're gonna start by
Drinking old cheap bottles of wine,
Sit talking up all night,
Saying things we haven't for a while
A while, yeah
We're smiling but we're close to tears,
Even after all these years,
We just now got the feeling that we're meeting for the first time


Oh these times are hard,
Yeah they're making us crazy
Don't give up on me baby


But..still. Hope's there: